Two Comic Fragments
Photius was a ninth century Patriarch and Scholar of Constantinople who is now a Saint in the Eastern Orthodox Church. But he was also a lexicographer who preserved or hinted a fragments of many lost authors.
Laconian Assmen and Theseus (Photius 192.12)
“Laconian Ass-man”: Cleinias, had anal-sex, in the Laconian style. They call intercourse with boyfriends “to act like a Laconian”. This is how Theseus had sex with Helen, according to Aristarchus.
Κυσολάκων: ὁ Κλεινίας ὁ τωῖ κυσωῖ Λακωνίζων· τὸ δὲ τοῖς παιδικοῖς χρῆσθαι Λακωνίζειν λέγουσιν· ᾿Eλένηι γὰρ Θησεὺς οὕτως ἐχρήσατο, ὡς Ἀρίσταρχος.
Some texts have Μελαίνηι instead of ᾿Eλένηι. Some have ᾿Αριστοτέλης instead of Ἀρίσταρχος
An Amusing But Absolutely Impossible Etymology for Adolescent (Photius α 372)
“Adoleskhein: indicates talking philosophically about nature while conversing about everything else. The comic poets used the word leschainein for “having a conversation” (dialegesthai). And leskhai are places where people gather to spend the day in conversation.’
᾿Αδολεσχεῖν· σημαίνει μὲν τὸ φιλοσοφεῖν περί τε φύσεως καὶ τοῦ παντὸς διαλεσχαίνοντα. οἱ μέντοι ἀρχαῖοι κωμικοὶ λεσχαίνειν ἔλεγον τὸ διαλέγεσθαι. καὶ λέσχαι οἱ τόποι, εἰς οὓς συνιόντες λόγοις διημέρευον.
