Vegetables, Insults, Philosophy

Diogenes Laertius, Lives of the PhilosophersAristippus (2.68)

“One day, as Diogenes was washing vegetables, he saw Aristippus nearby and mocked him by saying, ‘If you had learned to like foods like these, you would not have had to act like a servant in the halls of kings.’ Aristippus then replied, ‘And if you had learned to get along among other people, you would not be washing vegetables.’

When he was asked what he got from philosophy, he responded, ‘The ability to associate with everyone boldly and without fear.’

One time, when he was upbraided for his luxuriant lifestyle, he said, ‘If luxury were a bad thing, it would not occur in the feasts of the gods.’”

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Παριόντα ποτὲ αὐτὸν λάχανα πλύνων Διογένης ἔσκωψε καί φησιν, “εἰ ταῦτα ἔμαθες προσφέρεσθαι, οὐκ ἂν τυράννων αὐλὰς ἐθεράπευες.” ὁ δέ, “καὶ σύ,” εἶπεν, “εἴπερ ᾔδεις ἀνθρώποις ὁμιλεῖν, οὐκ ἂν λάχανα ἔπλυνες.” ἐρωτηθεὶς τί αὐτῷ περιγέγονεν  ἐκ φιλοσοφίας, ἔφη, “τὸ δύνασθαι πᾶσι θαρρούντως ὁμιλεῖν.” ὀνειδιζόμενός ποτ’ ἐπὶ τῷ πολυτελῶς ζῆν, “εἰ τοῦτ’,” ἔφη, “φαῦλόν ἐστιν, οὐκ ἂν ἐν ταῖς τῶν θεῶν ἑορταῖς ἐγίνετο.”

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