Agamemnon’s Relationship Counseling: Ovid, Remedia Amoris 466-486

“Agamemnon saw (and what did he not see, since all of Greece was subject to his judgment?) Chryseis, captured by his own martial valor, and he loved her: but her foolish old father went all around weeping for her! (Why are you crying, you hateful old man? They’ve made a good match! You idiot, you’re harming your daughter with your meddling!) After Calchas, under the protection of Achilles, had ordered that she be returned and she was safely received home, Agamemnon said, ‘Well, this other girl has a fairly similar appearance, and, excepting the first syllable, practically the same name! If he knows what’s best for him, Achilles will give her to me willingly: if not, he will feel the weight of my power. And, my Achaeans, if any of you should censure this action, – well, it really is something to hold a sceptre in a mighty hand. For, if I am king, and no girl sleeps with me, Thersites may as well go ahead and take the throne from me!’ So he spoke, and had this to ease the burden of his earlier loss, and he set aside his concern, which was forced aside by new concerns. Therefore, take counsel from Agamemnon and take up a new flame, and let your love be drawn apart in opposite directions!”

Vidit ut Atrides (quid enim non ille videret,
Cuius in arbitrio Graecia tota fuit?)
Marte suo captam Chryseida, victor amabat:
At senior stulte flebat ubique pater. 470
Quid lacrimas, odiose senex? bene convenit illis:
Officio natam laedis, inepte, tuo.
Quam postquam reddi Calchas, ope tutus Achillis,
Iusserat, et patria est illa recepta domo,
‘Est’ ait Atrides ‘illius proxima forma, 475
Et, si prima sinat syllaba, nomen idem:
Hanc mihi, si sapiat, per se concedat Achilles:
Si minus, imperium sentiat ille meum.
Quod siquis vestrum factum hoc incusat, Achivi,
Est aliquid valida sceptra tenere manu. 480
Nam si rex ego sum, nec mecum dormiat ulla,
In mea Thersites regna, licebit, eat.’
Dixit, et hanc habuit solacia magna prioris,
Et posita est cura cura repulsa nova.
Ergo adsume novas auctore Agamemnone flammas, 485
Ut tuus in bivio distineatur amor.

Ovid’s Worst Lines: Seneca, Controversiae, 2.2.12

“Ovid rarely gave declamations on controversies, and those always of the ethical (character) variety. He was happier to declaim suasoriae (persuasion speeches). He hated to adduce proofs of any kind. In oratory, he did not choose his words with the same careless lack of restraint which he used in his poems, the faults of which he was not ignorant of – nay, he loved them! The surest proof of this is the fact that once, when he was asked by his friends if he would remove three verses from his poems, he asked in turn that he could make an exception for three verses, against which their request would not stand.

The proposal seemed fair, so they wrote in secret the three which they wanted to see removed, and he wrote down the ones which he wished preserved. In both pieces of paper there were the same three verses, of which the first was (as told by Albinovanus Pedo, who was among the judges):

semibovemque virum semivirumque bovem (Half-ox man, half-man ox)

The second:

et gelidum Borean egelidumque Notum. (Cold Boreas, and not-cold Notus.)

From which it is clear that this man of remarkable talent was not lacking the judgment to hold back the licentiousness of his poems, but rather, he lacked the will to do so. He would occasionally remark that that face was prettier which had a mole upon it.”

Declamabat autem Naso raro controversias et non nisi ethicas. libentius dicebat suasorias. molesta illi erat omnis argumentatio. verbis minime licenter usus est, non (ut) in carminibus, in quibus non ignoravit vitia sua sed amavit. manifestum potest esse (ex eo), quod rogatus aliquando ab amicis suis, ut tolleret tres versus, invicem petit, ut ipse tres exciperet, in quos nihil illis liceret. aequa lex visa est: scripserunt illi quos tolli vellent secreto, hic quos tutos esse vellet. in utrisque codicillis idem versus erant, ex quibus primum fuisse narrabat Albinovanus Pedo, qui inter arbitros fuit:

semibovemque virum semivirumque bovem;

secundum:

et gelidum Borean egelidumque Notum.

ex quo apparet summi ingenii viro non iudicium defuisse ad compescendam licentiam carminum suorum sed animum. aiebat interim decentiorem faciem esse, in qua aliquis naevus fuisset.

Some Monday Erotica: Ovid, Amores 1.5.17-26

CAVE LECTOR: This passage is a bit on the prurient side!

“As she stood before my eyes with her dress put aside, there was no blemish anywhere upon her body. Ah, what arms I saw and touched! How the form of her breasts begged to be touched! What a smooth stomach under her tight chest! Ah, what hips, what thighs! But why should I relate these things one-by-one? I saw nothing that didn’t deserve praise, and I pressed her naked body to mine. Who doesn’t know the rest of the story? We both lay there exhausted. I hope that I have many more afternoons like this!”

ut stetit ante oculos posito velamine nostros,
in toto nusquam corpore menda fuit.
quos umeros, quales vidi tetigique lacertos!
forma papillarum quam fuit apta premi!               20
quam castigato planus sub pectore venter!
quantum et quale latus! quam iuvenale femur!
Singula quid referam? nil non laudabile vidi
et nudam pressi corpus ad usque meum.
Cetera quis nescit? lassi requievimus ambo.               25
proveniant medii sic mihi saepe dies!

Quintilian’s Judgment on Ovid’s Medea (Institutio Oratoria 10.1.98)

“The Medea of Ovid seems to me to display just how much that man could have excelled if he had preferred to train rather than to indulge his genius.”

Ovidi Medea videtur mihi ostendere quantum ille vir praestare potuerit si ingenio suo imperare quam indulgere maluisset.

The Hands of Achilles: Ovid, Ars Amatoria 1.11-16

“Chiron made Achilles expert at the cithara, and molded his fierce spirit with a gentle art. He who so often terrified his companions, so often terrified his enemies, is thought to have feared an aged old man. Those hands, which Hector would one day feel, he offered up to be flogged when his teacher so demanded.”

Phillyrides puerum cithara perfecit Achillem

atque animos placida contudit arte feros.

qui totiens socios, totiens exterruit hostes

creditur annosum pertimuisse senem;

quas Hector sensurus erat, poscente magistro

verberibus iussas praebuit ille manus.

NOTE: I am conscious of the serious deficiency of this translation; I doubt very much that the effect of quas sensurus erat could be adequately captured in English. I had not read this poem for some time, and in coming back to it, I was reminded of the consummate artistry of Ovid, who really excels at rendering grand emotional effects through very specific particularization; in this case, by focusing on the hands of Achilles and their history.

Teiresias the Trans-Prophet: Origins of Prophecy and A Long-life, Not Requested

Book 3 of Ovid’s Metamorphoses offers a delightful tale about Teiresias’ blindness and power of prophecy. The Theban was born as a man but changed into a woman when he saw two snakes copulating in the forest. Years later—after getting married and having at least one child—she happened to be walking in the forest and witnessed the same thing. Wham! Teiresias was a man again.

Sometime after that, Teiresias was summoned to Olympus to adjudicate a marital dispute between Zeus and Hera who had been arguing about whether sex was better for males or females. Teiresias gave an enigmatic answer (1 part enjoyment far a man to 10 for women) and Hera blinded him in rage. Zeus compensated for this by giving him the power of prophecy.

What most people don’t know is that this tale is not at all an Ovidian innovation. A few fragments attributed to Hesiod preserve the answer and Teiresias’ reaction to Zeus’ “gift”.

The first few lines present Hesiod’s answer (Fr. 275):

[Teiresias described how]

“A man delights only in one portion of ten
While a woman delights her thoughts filling out the other ten.”

οἴην μὲν μοῖραν δέκα μοιρέων τέρπεται ἀνήρ,
τὰς δὲ δέκ’ ἐμπίπλησι γυνὴ τέρπουσα νόημα.
Another fragment appears to have Teiresias addressing Zeus (fr. 276):

“Zeus father I wish that you would give me a shorter life
And grant that I might know only the things equal to the thoughts
Of mortal men. Now you have not honored me at all,
You who have made my lifetime so long,
That I will live on through seven generations of mortal men.”

Ζεῦ πάτερ, εἴθε μοι †εἴθ’ ἥσσω μ’† αἰῶνα βίοιο
ὤφελλες δοῦναι καὶ ἴσα φρεσὶ μήδεα ἴδμεν
θνητοῖς ἀνθρώποις· νῦν δ’ οὐδέ με τυτθὸν ἔτισας,
ὃς μακρόν γέ μ’ ἔθηκας ἔχειν αἰῶνα βίοιο
ἑπτά τ’ ἐπὶ ζώειν γενεὰς μερόπων ἀνθρώπων

Teiresias is right to lament. As he probably knows from his recent power of prophecy, he will witness Dionysus’ return to Thebes (and subsequent bloodshed); the exposure of Oedipus and his parricidal, incestuous return; the deaths of Oedipus’ sons Eteokles and Polyneices at each other’s hands; and the sack of Thebes in the next generation. And even then his story isn’t over: Odysseus will wake up his tired ghost in the Odyssey for one more prophecy.

As for Teiresias’ answer to Zeus and Hera? When I teach this story I joke that he’s more afraid of Zeus than his wife. But his answer is part of a general Greek misogyny that justifies the cloistering of woman by characterizing them as libidinous by nature. The number 10 seems significant here: there may be an irony in the use of “enjoy”. In the Greek world, babies are born after 10 lunar months. If I had to give an answer to why “10:1” to save my life, that would be all I would have.

Fortunately, no Olympian beings will be seeking my advice…

Cats, Gods and Weasels in Ancient Greece

αἰλουροπρόσωπος: [ailouroprosôpos] “cat-faced”

αἰλουρόμορφος: [ailouromorphos] “cat-shaped”

A student in my myth class spontaneously asked about which deity would be the patron of cats in Ancient Greece. As is my custom—when I have no idea—I admitted I didn’t know but then added from my knowledge of ancient Greek (αἴλουρος, the word for “cat”, felix domesticus did not come readily to mind) and Greek literature (where cats appear rarely apart from fables) it was my intuition that cats would not have featured prominently in Greek religion and culture. (I also added that dogs appeared as close to men in Homer; whereas cats are a mostly later addition.)

Since we live in the miraculous age of information, I was fact-checked. According to the internet, since Artemis was associated with the Ancient Egyptian goddess related to cats (Bast(a)), then Artemis was a deity of cats. Alas, I responded in class, this makes some sense, but, I added, since Artemis is the potnia thêrôn (queen of wild beasts), her identification with felix domesticus was a bit incomplete. And over the weekend, a student reminded me about the subject:

http://twitter.com/TheEgoAndTheSid/status/586654184654577664

The best ancient source for Athena and cats? A later Greek author Antoninus Liberalis who lived sometime between 100 and 200 BCE. In his Metamorphoses (26.7) he describes how the gods ran away from Typhon and disguised themselves as animals: Ares become a fish, Dionysus a goat and Artemis a cat. The internet also reports that Ovid describes a servant of Alcmene aiding in the birth of Herakles—the goddess, enraged, turned her into a cat and made her a priestess of Hekate. But this is not actually true. Instead, the creature in question is a weasel or polecat.

(And for good modern fun, check out Rudy Giuliani’s fear of ferrets).

It seems that in ancient Greece, a weasel (probably closer to our ferret) was domesticated and used for rodent control. In fact, in the Batrakhomuomakhia (the “Battle of Frogs and Mice), when the mouse speaks of its greatest fears, it does not, contrary to what we might expect, mention a cat.

“But I do fear two things over the whole earth:
the raven (?) and the weasel who bring me great grief
and the grievous mousetrap where a deceptive fate awaits me.
But I fear the weasel more than anything, that beast who is best
At ferreting a hole-dweller out of his hole.]”

51         πλεῖστον δὴ γαλέην περιδείδια, ἥ τις ἀρίστη,
52         ἣ καὶ τρωγλοδύνοντα κατὰ τρώγλην ἐρεείνει.
53         οὐ τρώγω ῥαφάνους, οὐ κράμβας, οὐ κολοκύντας,
54         οὐ σεύτλοις χλωροῖς ἐπιβόσκομαι, οὐδὲ σελίνοις•
55         ταῦτα γὰρ ὑμέτερ’ ἐστὶν ἐδέσματα τῶν κατὰ λίμνην.

I do appreciate the student question, because I had always just assumed that domesticated cats were a part of Greek life. While it seems that they did become much more common during the Hellenistic period and later, it is clear from the language and literature that weasels fulfilled their cultural (and poetic) roles. The overlap between the function of the animals leads to confusion: some times the word for weasel (γαλέη, galea) may actually indicate a cat. There is a good old-fashioned article laying much of this out. Cats appear in Greek imagery as early as the sixth century BCE; they are still paired with weasels by the time of Plutarch (1st Century CE) and gatta appears in Greek by the 5th century BCE.

The modern Greek for cat (Gata), in fact, represents a break with the ancient Greek Ailouros. The former, which is likely related to the same root that gives us modern “cat” (French, “le chat”; Spanish el gato; German Katze etc.), is a later addition to the language. But the latter gives us ailourophobia (“fear of cats”) and ailouranthrope (“catperson”)!

But, if the later Greeks did adopt cats and they knew the tale recorded by Antoninus, then it seems it would be fairest to let Artemis have here. Hekate gets the puppies anyway.

thanks to this post, I have the following horror in my head:

Omnia Vincit Amor? Maybe. Ovid, Metamorphoses, 7.72-3

“…then Probity, Piety, and Shame stood before her eyes, and vanquished Cupid gave retreat.”

et ante oculos Rectum Pietasque Pudorque

constiterant et victa dabat iam terga Cupido.

Jupiter Amputates the Human Race: Ovid, Metamorphoses 1.90-91(Also, Caligula and Housman)

“All options must be tried, but ultimately the part of the body which does not admit of healing must be cut off, lest the good part be lost.”

 

cuncta prius temptanda, sed immedicabile corpus

ense recidendum est, ne pars sincera trahatur.

 

This is excerpted from the scene in Ovid’s Metamorphoses in which Jupiter resolves to extirpate the human race because its ferocious malignity threatened ruin to the gods at every turn. Compare this to the sentiment expressed by Caligula, as recorded in Suetonius biography (chp. 30):

“Oh, I wish that the Roman people had but one neck!”

Utinam p. R. unam cervicem haberet!

 

Also, one may compare A.E. Housman, A Shropshire Lad, XLV:

If it chance your eye offend you,
Pluck it out, lad, and be sound:
’Twill hurt, but here are salves to friend you,
And many a balsam grows on ground.

And if your hand or foot offend you,
Cut it off, lad, and be whole;
But play the man, stand up and end you,
When your sickness is your soul.

Sometimes You Might be Too Pretty to Be Loved (Sappho to Phaon; Ovid Heroides, 15.31-40)

“If unfair nature denied beauty to me,
Take in exchange for appearance my wit.
I am short, but my name stretches across all lands:
I am the measure of my fame not my height.
If I am not pale enough, well, Cepheian Andromeda,
Dark with the color of her country, pleased Perseus!
White doves often mate with different colors:
The dark turtle-dove has a love dressed in green.
If no one who cannot be worthy of you in beauty alone
will be yours, then no one will ever be yours.”

si mihi difficilis formam natura negavit,
ingenio formae damna repende meae.
sum brevis. at nomen, quod terras impleat omnes,
est mihi: mensuram nominis ipsa fero.
candida si non sum, placuit Cepheia Perseo
Andromede patriae fusca colore suae.
et variis albae iunguntur saepe columbae
et niger a viridi turtur amatur ave.
si nisi quae facie poterit te digna videri,
nulla futura tua est, nulla futura tua est!

Sappho writes this letter, according to Ovid, to Phaon.