Tipsy Tuesday: Some BULLSHIT Advice on Temperance

Aeneas Silvius Piccolomini, On the Education of Boys (19):

Since the delight of taste holds back many people in both drink and in food, you should take care that you don’t become fond either of drinking too much or drinking wine which is too good. You should avoid every drink which can make you drunk. Let your drinking be moderate, of the sort which will not depress the mind, but will bear away your thirst. Nothing is more shameful than a boy who is keen on wine. ‘The use of wine,’ according to Valerius, ‘was unknown to Roman women at one time.’ What about the boys? Shall we suffer the minds of our boys to go fully Dionysian, or shall we destroy the rising mind with undiluted drink? Though it be entirely unpardonable in Teutonic custom to mix water with wine, I can in no way be persuaded that strong wine should ever be placed at a boy’s table unless it be corrected with the addition of water.

File:Monk sneaking a drink.jpg
British Library manuscript Sloane 2435, f. 44v.

Verum, cum delectatio gustus plerosque non minus in potu quam in cibo detineat, cavendum est, tibi ne vel multi bibulus vel optimi bibulus fias. Omnem quae potest inebriare potionem vitabis. Sit moderata bibitio; non quae mentem gravet, sed quae sitim auferat. Multum succi in pueris est; lacte sunt et sanguine pleni raroque sitim sentiunt. Appetitore vini puero nihil turpius est. ‘Usus vini’ sicut Valerius ait, ‘Romanis olim feminis ignotus fuit.’ Quid pueris? Feremusne puerorum bacchari mentes aut vini surgentem ingenii iugulabimus mero? Quamvis Teutonico more nefas sit aquam misceri vino, mihi tamen nulla ratione persuasum fuerit fumosum vinum, nisi aqua castigatum, puerorum mensis apponi debere.

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