Hegemon the Parodist, fr. 1 (Brandt 1988): Thasian BM-Missiles



When I arrived at Thasos they met me with missiles of shit.

And then someone stood near me and said:

“Dirtiest of all men, who persuaded you to mount

this pristine stage with feet like yours?”


᾿Ες δὲ Θάσον μ’ ἐλθόντα μετεωρίζοντες ἔβαλλον

πολλοῖσι σπελέθοισι, καὶ ὧδέ τις εἶπε παραστάς·

‘ὦ πάντων ἀνδρῶν βδελυρώτατε, τίς σ’ ἀνέπεισεν

καλὴν ἐς κρηπῖδα ποσὶν τοιοῖσδ’ ἀναβῆναι;’


I like parody. Who doesn’t? Not enough people know about the Batrakhomuomakhia. But I knew nothing about Hegemon before today. Hegemon? Apparently the inventor of parody who does not merit a Wikipedia page of his own.


I like this because of the language, oh and the ugly feet thing. I empathize.  In the rest of the passage, the speaker says that Athena came to him and encouraged him to sing