Tag: Genitals

Tawdry Tuesday: A Wedding Recipe

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Aristophanes, Peace 868-870

“The child is bathed and her ass-situation is fine.
The cake is baking and the sesame buns are shaped—
Everything else is complete—but we need a penis.”

ἡ παῖς λέλουται καὶ τὰ τῆς πυγῆς καλά·
ὁ πλακοῦς πέπεπται, σησαμῆ ξυμπλάττεται,
870καὶ τἄλλ᾿ ἁπαξάπαντα· τοῦ πέους δὲ δεῖ.

According to a scholion, sesame cakes are made for weddings to ensure an abundance of offspring (vet σησαμὴ R: πλακοῦς γαμικὸς ἀπὸ σησάμων πεποιημένος διὰ τὸ πολύγονον, ὥς φησι Μένανδρος. RV)

Later, a Slave remarks on the girl’s rear end:“Master, she’s got a five-year ass” ὦ δέσποτα, ὅσην ἔχει τὴν πρωκτοπεντετηρίδα. (876).

Image result for ancient greek comedy wedding

A scholion relates this to the frequency of the completion of the Dionysia. Another adds that at this point they are grabbing the girl and showing her genitals to the audience. (Schol V. ad Aristop. Pax 867b ἁπτόμενος γὰρ αὐτῆς τῆς πυγῆς <φησι> καὶ θαυμάζων καὶ τοῖς θεαταῖς ἐπιδεικνύμενος τὸ αἰδοῖον. V Although, here we should probably imagine a male actor with female genital apparatus).

From Henderson’s Maculate Muse:

Peos

Breakfast of Champions (NSFW)?

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This is probably not safe for work.

Aristophanes, Wealth 295

“You’re following with your dicks out; and you will eat breakfast [like] goats”

ἕπεσθ’ ἀπεψωλημένοι· τράγοι δ’ ἀκρατιεῖσθε.

From the Suda

“You will breakfast”: Aristophanes in Wealth has “You will breakfast like goats”. This means you will breakfast with an exposed penis: you will do wild things like goats, since after sex, goats lick the penis. [So this means] you will lick the end of a dick like a goat.”

Ἀκρατιεῖσθε: Ἀριστοφάνης Πλούτῳ: τράγοι δ’ ἀκρατιεῖσθε. τουτέστιν ἀπεψωλημένοι ἀκρατιεῖσθε: ἀντὶ τοῦ ὡς τράγοι ἀκρατῆ πράξετε, ἐπεὶ μετὰ τὴν συνουσίαν οἱ τράγοι λείχουσι τὸ αἰδοῖον. τὸ ἄκρον λείξετε ὡς τράγοι.

The scholia to this passage have a few different interpretations:
Scholia ad. Arist. Plut.

“[They used to thing it means] “You are licking your balls like goats”. Clearly, this means: you are licking genitals.”

ἤγουν δίκην τράγων τοὺς ὄρχεις λείχετε. P. λείχετε τὰ αἰδοῖα δηλονότι. Br.

Scholia recentiora Tzetzae

“akratieisthe” stands in for “you would eat”. For akratismos means eating first thing in the morning. Or, “you will do wild things”, since after intercourse, goats lick their own genitals.”

τὸ δ’ “ἀκρατιεῖσθε” ἀντὶ τοῦ “φάγοιτε”· ἀκρατισμὸς γὰρ λέγεται τὸ πρωϊνὸν φαγεῖν. ἢ “ἀκρατῆ πράσσετε”, ἐπειδὴ μετὰ συνουσίαν οἱ τράγοι λείχουσι τὰ αἰδοῖα ἑαυτῶν.

Image result for Ancient Greek goat

Proverbs for Pointlessness, Prostitution and Poverty

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More Entries from the Suda

“Khamai: on the ground.  There is also a proverb:’ to trace water on the ground’—which is the same as accomplishing nothing. Another example of this is “washing a brick”. These are uttered for tasks that have no end.”

Χαμαί: ἐπὶ τῆς γῆς. καὶ παροιμία· Χαμαὶ ἀντλεῖν, ἐν ἴσῳ τῷ οὐδὲν ἐργάζεσθαι. οἷον καὶ τὸ πλίνθον πλύνειν. ἐπὶ τῶν ἀνηνύτων λέγεται.

 

“Khoiros: An animal, piglet, piggy. But in Corinth this also means female genitals. This is the origin of the proverb: “You seem like you’re going to sell piggies in Acrocorinth”; we use this to mean “earning a wage in Corinth” because there are many prostitutes there.”

Χοῖρος: τὸ ζῷον. παρὰ Κορινθίοις δὲ τὸ γυναικεῖον αἰδοῖον. ἔνθεν καὶ παροιμία· ᾿Ακροκορινθία ἔοικας χοιροπωλήσειν. ἀντὶ τοῦ ἔοικας μισθαρνήσειν ἐν Κορίνθῳ· πολλαὶ γὰρ ἐκεῖ ἑταῖραι.

pig vase
This is not the pig in the proverb….

“Worshiping Dionysus in Psyra”: A Proverb found in Cratinus.  Psyra is a poor, small island close to Khios and it is unable to produce wine.  Therefore, we use this proverb for people reclining at the symposium but not drinking.  It is also used in reference to other displays of poverty.”

Ψύρα τὸν Διόνυσον ἄγοντες: ἡ παροιμία παρὰ Κρατίνῳ. τὰ δὲ Ψύρα εὐτελὴς νῆσός ἐστι καὶ μικρὰ πλησίον Χίου, μὴ δυναμένη οἶνον ἐνεγκεῖν. λέγομεν οὖν τὴν παροιμίαν ἐπὶ τῶν ἐν συμποσίῳ ἀνακειμένων καὶ μὴ πινόντων. λέλεκται δὲ καὶ ἐπὶ τῶν εὐτέλειαν σημαινόντων.