A Wholly Tragic Life: Aelian, Varia Historia 3.29

“Diogenes of Sinope was constantly saying of himself that he himself had fulfilled and suffered all of the imprecations of tragedy, for he was ‘A wanderer, homeless, deprived of his country, a beggar in shoddy clothes, living from day to day.’ Yet at the same time he was no less impressed with this condition than Alexander was with the rule of the entire world, when he returned to Babylon after taking India.”

Διογένης ὁ Σινωπεὺς συνεχῶς ἐπέλεγεν ὑπὲρ ἑαυτοῦ ὅτι τὰς ἐκ τῆς τραγῳδίας ἀρὰς αὐτὸς ἐκπληροῖ καὶ ὑπομένει· εἶναι γὰρ

πλάνης ἄοικος πατρίδος ἐστερημένος

πτωχὸς δυσείμων βίον ἔχων ἐφήμερον.

καὶ ὅμως ἐπὶ τούτοις μέγα ἐφρόνει οὐδὲν ἧττον ἢ ᾿Αλέξανδρος ἐπὶ τῇ τῆς οἰκουμένης ἀρχῇ, ὅτε καὶ ᾿Ινδοὺς ἑλὼν ἐς Βαβυλῶνα ὑπέστρεψεν.

Wise Frogs Surpass Snakes in Wisdom, Aelian 1.3

“A type of Egyptian frog is a bit of a wise creature and for this reason it surpasses other frogs by a lot. If it this frog runs into a water snake that lives in the Nile, it bites off a shoot of reed and carries it forward obliquely and holds it tight, and it will not let it go until its strength gives out. The snake cannot eat the frog with the reed, since its mouth will not open as wide as the reed would demand. From this trick, the frogs surpass the strength of the watersnake with wisdom”

Σοφόν τι ἄρα χρῆμα ἦν γένος βατράχων Αἰγυπτίων, καὶ οὖν καὶ τῶν ἄλλων ὑπερφέρουσι κατὰ πολύ. ἐὰν γὰρ ὕδρῳ περιπέσῃ Νείλου θρέμματι βάτραχος, καλάμου τρύφος ἐνδακὼν πλάγιον φέρει, καὶ ἀπρὶξ ἔχεται, καὶ οὐκ ἀνίησι κατὰ τὸ καρτερόν. ὃ δὲ ἀμηχανεῖ καταπιεῖν αὐτὸν αὐτῷ καλάμῳ• οὐ γάρ οἱ ἐγχωρεῖ περιβαλεῖν τοσοῦτον τὸ στόμα, ὅσον ὁ κάλαμος διείργει. καὶ ἐκ τούτου περιγίνονται τῆς ῥώμης τῶν ὕδρων οἱ βάτραχοι τῇ σοφίᾳ.

Mice Are Prophetic; Ants are Too : Aelian, Varia Historia 1.11

“Mice are also among the most prophetic of the animals. For, when a house has already become decrepit and is about to collapse, they perceive it and they abandon the mouse-holes within them and their earlier habits. They run off with whatever speed they can muster and settle elsewhere.

Ants, I have heard too, have a certain knowledge of prophecy. Whenever a famine is soon to develop, they work terribly hard at stockpiling food. They put aside a store of grain and the shells of seeds, all those things that ants eat for dinner.”

῏Ησαν δὲ ἄρα μαντικώτατοι τῶν ζῴων καὶ μύες. γηρώσης γὰρ οἰκίας ἤδη καὶ μελλούσης κατολισθάνειν αἰσθάνονται πρῶτοι, καὶ ἀπολιπόντες τὰς μυωπίας τὰς αὑτῶν καὶ τὰς ἐξ ἀρχῆς διατριβάς, ᾗ ποδῶν ἔχουσιν ἀποδιδράσκουσι καὶ μετοικίζονται.
῎Εχουσι δὲ καὶ οἱ μύρμηκες, ὡς ἀκούω, μαντικῆς τινα αἴσθησιν. ὅταν γὰρ μέλλῃ λιμὸς ἔσεσθαι, δεινῶς εἰσι φιλόπονοι πρὸς τὸ θησαυρίσαι καὶ ἑαυτοῖς ἀποταμιεύσασθαι τοὺς πυροὺς καὶ τὰ λοιπὰ τῶν σπερμάτων, ὅσα μυρμήκων δεῖπνόν ἐστιν.

The Power of Someone Who Loves: A Timely Bit from Aelian (3.9)

“Someone who does not love will not fight equally to the man who does, when the battle strikes and war crashes together. The unloved man flees and runs in front of the one who loves, as if he were an alien, and uninitiated into the god–brave only as far as his soul can reach and the strength of his body holds.”

᾿Ερῶντι ἀνδρί τις οὐκ ἐρῶν ἐπειγούσης τῆς μάχης καὶ συνάγοντος τοῦ πολέμου οὐκ ἂν συμμίξειεν. ὁ γὰρ ἀνέραστος φεύγει καὶ ἀποδιδράσκει τὸν ἐρωτικόν, ἅτε βέβηλος καὶ ἀτέλεστος τῷ θεῷ καὶ τοσοῦτον ἀνδρεῖος, ὅσον αὐτῷ καὶ ἡ ψυχὴ χωρεῖ καὶ τὸ σῶμα ῥώμης ἔχει·

Some Politicians Get Wealthy in Office; A Few Don’t (Aelian 10.17)

“Kritias says that Themistokles the son of Neokles, before he became a politician, had inherited a family fortune of three talents. After he had been involved in public life, fled, and his property was liquidated, he was exposed as having a wealth greater than one hundred talents. Similarly, before serving the public interest, it seems that Kleon had nothing that was free [of debt]. Afterwards he let behind him a household worth fifty talents.”

 

Λέγει Κριτίας Θεμιστοκλέα τὸν Νεοκλέους πρὶν  ἢ ἄρξασθαι πολιτεύεσθαι, τρία τάλαντα ἔχειν τὴν οὐσίαν τὴν πατρῴαν· ἐπεὶ δὲ τῶν κοινῶν προέστη εἶτα ἔφυγε, καὶ ἐδημεύθη αὐτοῦ ἡ οὐσία, κατεφωράθη ἑκατὸν ταλάντων πλείω οὐσίαν ἔχων. ὁμοίως δὲ καὶ Κλέωνα πρὸ τοῦ παρελθεῖν ἐπὶ τὰ κοινὰ μηδὲν τῶν οἰκείων ἐλεύθερον εἶναι· μετὰ δὲ πεντήκοντα ταλάντων τὸν οἶκον ἀπέλιπε.

Where’s Alcibiades’ House on a Map? Aelian, Varia Historia 3.28

“When Socrates noticed that Alkibiades was all puffed up because of his wealth and proud thanks to his property especially because of his lands, he led him to some part of the city where a tablet stood marked with an outline of the earth. He requested for Alkibiades to find Attica. When he found it, he asked him to find his own properties. When he responded “but they are not marked on here,” Socrates said “You think so highly of these things which don’t even amount to a fragment of the earth?”

῾Ορῶν ὁ Σωκράτης τὸν ᾿Αλκιβιάδην τετυφωμένον ἐπὶ τῷ πλούτῳ καὶ μέγα φρονοῦντα ἐπὶ τῇ περιουσίᾳ καὶ ἔτι πλέον ἐπὶ τοῖς ἀγροῖς, ἤγαγεν αὐτὸν ἔς τινα
τῆς πόλεως τόπον ἔνθα ἀνέκειτο πινάκιον ἔχον γῆς περίοδον, καὶ προσέταξε τῷ ᾿Αλκιβιάδῃ τὴν ᾿Αττικὴν ἐνταῦθ’ ἀναζητεῖν. ὡς δ’ εὗρε, προσέταξεν αὐτῷ τοὺς ἀγροὺς τοὺς ἰδίους διαθρῆσαι. τοῦ δὲ εἰπόντος ‘ἀλλ’ οὐδαμοῦ γεγραμμένοι εἰσίν’ ‘ἐπὶ τούτοις οὖν’ εἶπε ‘μέγα φρονεῖς, οἵπερ οὐδὲν μέρος τῆς γῆς εἰσιν;’

Differences Between Kingship and Tyranny: Aelian, 2.20

“They say that Antigonus the king was popular and mild. It is possible for anyone who has the time to study about him to examine the very sources about the man. He will discover there that he was altogether kind and inoffensive, as I am about to explain. Antigonus, when he saw his son treating their subjects rather violently and rashly, said “Don’t you know, child, that our kingdom is merely a glorified slavery?” This word from Antigonos to his child was rather kind and humane. To whomever this is not the case, he seems to me to know neither what is kingly or political, but rather to have lived under a tyranny”

᾿Αντίγονόν φασι τὸν βασιλέα δημοτικὸν καὶ πρᾶον γενέσθαι. καὶ ὅτῳ μὲν σχολὴ τὰ κατ’ αὐτὸν εἰδέναι καὶ αὐτὰ ἕκαστα ἐξετάζειν ὑπὲρ τοῦ ἀνδρός, εἴσεταιἑτέρωθεν• εἰρήσεται δ’ οὖν αὐτοῦ καὶ πάνυ πρᾶον καὶ ἄτυφον ὃ μέλλω λέγειν. ὁ ᾿Αντίγονος οὗτος ὁρῶν τὸν υἱὸν τοῖς ὑπηκόοις χρώμενον βιαιότερόν τε καὶ θρασύτερον ‘οὐκ οἶσθα’ εἶπεν, ‘ὦ παῖ, τὴν βασιλείαν ἡμῶν ἔνδοξον εἶναι δουλείαν;’ καὶ τὰ μὲν τοῦ
᾿Αντιγόνου πρὸς τὸν παῖδα πάνυ ἡμέρως ἔχει καὶ φιλανθρώπως• ὅτῳ δὲ οὐ δοκεῖ ταύτῃ, ἀλλ’ ἐκεῖνός γε οὐ δοκεῖ μοι βασιλικὸν ἄνδρα εἰδέναι οὐδὲ πολιτικόν, τυραννικῷ δὲ συμβιῶσαι μᾶλλον.

Aeneas Didn’t Escape, The Greeks Let Him Go: Aelian, 3.22

“After they captured Troy, the Greeks pitied the fate of the captured people and they announced this altogether Greek thing: that each of the free men could select and take one of his possessions. Aeneas selected and was carrying his ancestral gods, after dismissing everything else. Impressed by the righteousness of this man, the Greeks conceded that he may take a second possession away. Then, Aeneas placed his father—who was extremely old—on his shoulders and walked off. Because they were so amazed, they granted him all of his own possessions, attesting to the fact that men who are enemies by nature become mild when faced with righteous men who revere the gods and their parents.”

῞Οτε ἑάλω τὸ ῎Ιλιον, οἰκτείραντες οἱ ᾿Αχαιοὶ τὰς τῶν ἁλισκομένων τύχας καὶ πάνυ ῾Ελληνικῶς τοῦτο ἐκήρυξαν, ἕκαστον τῶν ἐλευθέρων ἓν ὅ τι καὶ βούλεται τῶν οἰκείων ἀποφέρειν ἀράμενον. ὁ οὖν Αἰνείας τοὺς πατρῴους θεοὺς βαστάσας ἔφερεν, ὑπεριδὼν τῶν ἄλλων. ἡσθέντες οὖν ἐπὶ τῇ τοῦ ἀνδρὸς εὐσεβείᾳ οἱ ῞Ελληνες καὶ δεύτερον αὐτῷ κτῆμα συνεχώρησαν λαβεῖν• ὃ δὲ τὸν πατέρα πάνυ σφόδρα γεγηρακότα ἀναθέμενος τοῖς ὤμοις ἔφερεν. ὑπερεκλαγέντες οὖν καὶ ἐπὶ τούτῳ οὐχ ἥκιστα, πάντων αὐτῷ τῶν οἰκείων κτημάτων ἀπέστησαν, ὁμολογοῦντες ὅτι πρὸς τοὺς εὐσεβεῖς τῶν ἀνθρώπων καὶ τοὺς θεοὺς καὶ τοὺς γειναμένους δι’ αἰδοῦς ἄγοντας καὶ οἱ φύσει πολέμιοι ἥμεροι γίνονται.

Athens Is Like A Prostitute (According to Isocrates): Aelian, 12.52

“The orator Isokrates used to say that the city of Athens was like prostitutes: men who are taken in by the beauty want to have sex with them, but no one is so totally insane that he wants to stay and live with them. In the same way, the Athenian city was a pleasurable place to visit and was quite different from all the other cities in Greece. But it was not a safe place to inhabit any more. In saying this he was indicating all of the flatterers who came from abroad and the various plots of the demagogues.”

᾿Ισοκράτης ὁ ῥήτωρ ἔλεγεν ὑπὲρ τῆς ᾿Αθηναίων πόλεως ὁμοίαν εἶναι ταῖς ἑταίραις. καὶ γὰρ τοὺς ἁλισκομένους ὑπὸ τῆς ὥρας αὐτῶν βούλεσθαι συνεῖναι αὐταῖς, ὅμως δὲ μηδένα εὐτελῶς οὕτω παραφρονεῖν, ὡς ὑπομεῖναι ἂν συνοικῆσαί τινι αὐτῶν. καὶ οὖν καὶ τὴν ᾿Αθηναίων πόλιν ἐνεπιδημῆσαι μὲν εἶναι ἡδίστην, καὶ κατά γε τοῦτο πασῶν τῶν κατὰ τὴν ῾Ελλάδα διαφέρειν· ἐνοικῆσαι δὲ ἀσφαλῆ μηκέτι εἶναι. ᾐνίττετο δὲ διὰ τούτων τοὺς ἐπιχωριάζοντας αὐτῇ συκοφάντας καὶ τὰς ἐκ τῶν δημαγωγούντων ἐπιβουλάς.

And twitter has taught me that this is a common motif:

https://twitter.com/juntakadaveres/status/606139397176721408

Crazy Love: Xerxes Fell in Love with a Tree (Aelian, Varia Historia 9.39)

“How could someone deny that the following types of love affairs are ridiculous and incredible? They say that Xerxes fell in love with a plane tree. An Athenian youth from a noble family was in love with a statue of Good fortune that stood near the Prytany. He used to show his affection by putting embracing the statue and then, out of mind and struck by desire, he went to the council-chamber and pleaded that he was prepared to spend however much money was needed to buy the statue. When he could not persuade them, he decorated the statue with crowns and garlands and he made a sacrifice, wrapped even more decoration around it, and then ended his own life after weeping endlessly. Some men say that a dog loved Glaukê the Kithara-player; others say it was a ram or a goose. Among the Soloi in Kilikia, a dog was loved by a boy named Xenophon; and at Sparta, a crow fell in love with a good-looking boy.”

Πῶς δὲ οὐκ ἂν φαίη τις γελοίους ἅμα καὶ παραδόξους τούσδε τοὺς ἔρωτας; τὸν μὲν Ξέρξου, ὅτι πλατάνου ἠράσθη. νεανίσκος δὲ ᾿Αθήνησι τῶν εὖ γεγονότων πρὸς τῷ πρυτανείῳ ἀνδριάντος ἑστῶτος τῆς ᾿Αγαθῆς Τύχης θερμότατα ἠράσθη. κατεφίλει γοῦν τὸν ἀνδριάντα περιβάλλων, εἶτα ἐκμανεὶς καὶ οἰστρηθεὶς ὑπὸ τοῦ πόθου, παρελθὼν ἐς τὴν βουλὴν καὶ λιτανεύσας ἕτοιμος ἦν πλείστων χρημάτων τὸ ἄγαλμα πρίασθαι. ἐπεὶ δὲ οὐκ ἔπειθεν, ἀναδήσας πολλαῖς ταινίαις καὶ στεφανώσας τὸ ἄγαλμα καὶ θύσας καὶ κόσμον αὐτῷ περιβαλὼν πολυτελῆ εἶτα ἑαυτὸν ἀπέκτεινε, μυρία προκλαύσας. Γλαύκης δὲ τῆς κιθαρῳδοῦ οἳ μέν φασιν ἐρασθῆναι κύνα, οἳ δὲ κριόν, οἳ δὲ χῆνα. καὶ ἐν Σόλοις δὲ τῆς Κιλικίας παιδὸς Ξενοφῶντος ἠράσθη κύων, ἄλλου δὲ ὡραίου μειρακίου ἐν Σπάρτῃ κολοιός.